Early Sunday Morning my Plane descended on to the Deer Lake Runway. My trip was over!
To my surprise the plane had trouble stopping. I knew we had gotten snow but didn't really know how much.
Two days prior they had cancelled all incoming flights to Newfoundland.
What was I coming home too?
As I sat waiting for my luggage I decided it best to leave my car at the airport and shuttle it home. No winter tires, plus snow and ice was not a good combo for one tired traveller who had been up for almost 24 hours.
12 hours earlier I left my heart in Costa Rica!
I sat on the plane holding back the ugly cry.
I felt different.
Changed!
To my surprise the plane had trouble stopping. I knew we had gotten snow but didn't really know how much.
Two days prior they had cancelled all incoming flights to Newfoundland.
What was I coming home too?
As I sat waiting for my luggage I decided it best to leave my car at the airport and shuttle it home. No winter tires, plus snow and ice was not a good combo for one tired traveller who had been up for almost 24 hours.
12 hours earlier I left my heart in Costa Rica!
I sat on the plane holding back the ugly cry.
I felt different.
Changed!
During my trip I had the opportunity to try SO many things that I never thought in a million years I would have the opportunity to try. I mean everything from Rappelling a waterfall to something as pure & organic as eating the flesh of a fresh Coconut.
Each of these experiences changed my life in some way.
I went on this retreat with an open heart and mind.
I wasn't looking to soul search, I didn't think something was missing from my life.
I was happy, and still am.
Turns out, there was a void. I needed to search a little deeper, peel off more layers than ever before.
I did this unknowingly and uncontrollably during a ceremony called a Cacao Ceremony.
The Cacao Ceremony is a popular ritual in Yoga Communities. Each ceremony is different depending on the facilitator and time of day.
Cacao ceremonies have been around for thousands of years and have been practiced by the ancient tribes.
In the past, Cacao was considered a sacred plant with healing properties. Not only was it used in ceremonial settings but it is also renowned as a Medicinal plant that aids in the healing of and opening up of the hearts circulation while aiding in the healing of mental, physical and spiritual health.
Because of the Cacao's heart opening qualities it is the perfect pairing for yoga and therapeutic work. Cacao facilitates a greater connection to other people and to yourself. It is sure to add a certain sacredness to your personal practice and a 'buzz' to your social gatherings.
Each of these experiences changed my life in some way.
I went on this retreat with an open heart and mind.
I wasn't looking to soul search, I didn't think something was missing from my life.
I was happy, and still am.
Turns out, there was a void. I needed to search a little deeper, peel off more layers than ever before.
I did this unknowingly and uncontrollably during a ceremony called a Cacao Ceremony.
The Cacao Ceremony is a popular ritual in Yoga Communities. Each ceremony is different depending on the facilitator and time of day.
Cacao ceremonies have been around for thousands of years and have been practiced by the ancient tribes.
In the past, Cacao was considered a sacred plant with healing properties. Not only was it used in ceremonial settings but it is also renowned as a Medicinal plant that aids in the healing of and opening up of the hearts circulation while aiding in the healing of mental, physical and spiritual health.
Because of the Cacao's heart opening qualities it is the perfect pairing for yoga and therapeutic work. Cacao facilitates a greater connection to other people and to yourself. It is sure to add a certain sacredness to your personal practice and a 'buzz' to your social gatherings.
Cacao
Photo Credit: Openwing
There was an alter of freshly picked flowers, candles, incense and small treasures.
We were told that if we have anything of importance that we would like to place on the alter we were welcomed as it would be blessed.
I chose my Grandmothers wedding rings.
It was said at the beginning of our ceremony that if you need to cry, you will cry, if you need sleep, you will sleep, if you need to laugh, you will laugh.
My first thought was "yeah right'!
It wasn't long after the ceremony started that I felt warm tears streaming down my face.
What was happening to me?
A cup of warm Cacao was passed around our circle, one for each person.
We all waited until each person had one before taking that first sip.
It was warm, chocolatey and sweet!
After a few moments we were asked to close our eyes and reflect on our day and time in the mountains. Think of a word or feeling. How did the mountains make us feel, what were we feeling?
We were told that if we have anything of importance that we would like to place on the alter we were welcomed as it would be blessed.
I chose my Grandmothers wedding rings.
It was said at the beginning of our ceremony that if you need to cry, you will cry, if you need sleep, you will sleep, if you need to laugh, you will laugh.
My first thought was "yeah right'!
It wasn't long after the ceremony started that I felt warm tears streaming down my face.
What was happening to me?
A cup of warm Cacao was passed around our circle, one for each person.
We all waited until each person had one before taking that first sip.
It was warm, chocolatey and sweet!
After a few moments we were asked to close our eyes and reflect on our day and time in the mountains. Think of a word or feeling. How did the mountains make us feel, what were we feeling?
My heart burst open!
I felt happiness, gratitude, sadness and strength.
So many thoughts raced through my mind.
My Grandmother, how much I miss her and how my heart hurts because I can never get that time back.
My Mom, How I owe all my of strength and stubbornness to her.
More importantly My heart, myself. How I owe it to myself to stop focusing on things and people that aren't worth my time. To stop forcing conversations, friendships, relationships, love, anything that wasted positive energy. I became completely aware of all the things I had been doing wrong, thoughts and actions I had spent on people who don't know my worth.
It felt so good to cry and let all of those emotions come roaring out. To share with the group how thankful I was to be there in that present moment with them.
How happy I was that Hailey wouldn't let me quit while climbing the Chakra Tree, forcing me to continue to be strong and never to give up.
I felt so vulnerable sitting in a room full of people that I had only known for a few days.
After a moment, I realized that I wasn't alone and by the end of this trip we would all connect on different levels and leave this magical place as friends.
Forever a little different.
Everything was okay.
I felt happiness, gratitude, sadness and strength.
So many thoughts raced through my mind.
My Grandmother, how much I miss her and how my heart hurts because I can never get that time back.
My Mom, How I owe all my of strength and stubbornness to her.
More importantly My heart, myself. How I owe it to myself to stop focusing on things and people that aren't worth my time. To stop forcing conversations, friendships, relationships, love, anything that wasted positive energy. I became completely aware of all the things I had been doing wrong, thoughts and actions I had spent on people who don't know my worth.
It felt so good to cry and let all of those emotions come roaring out. To share with the group how thankful I was to be there in that present moment with them.
How happy I was that Hailey wouldn't let me quit while climbing the Chakra Tree, forcing me to continue to be strong and never to give up.
I felt so vulnerable sitting in a room full of people that I had only known for a few days.
After a moment, I realized that I wasn't alone and by the end of this trip we would all connect on different levels and leave this magical place as friends.
Forever a little different.
Everything was okay.
I didn't know it at the time I booked this retreat but it came at exactly the right time in my life.
That time when I felt a little lost.
Where one door had closed in my life and another opened.
As my mom always says, "sometimes you just need to pick yourself up by the bootstraps and get on with it".
I needed this trip to "get on with it".
To move past all of the confusion, to stop hiding from my feelings. To open my heart even further, become at peace with myself, to be whole.
To be wild.
A friend referred to me during our retreat at Nomadic.
The truth is, I am wandering, and I always will.
I will be forever grateful to have wandered to Costa Rica entirely on my own, knowing only 1 person whom I had never met in person before.
What a bittersweet feeling
I guess the moral of the story is to Follow your heart! It will never lead you in the wrong direction.
Answer your calling, whatever that is.
And be true to yourself.
That time when I felt a little lost.
Where one door had closed in my life and another opened.
As my mom always says, "sometimes you just need to pick yourself up by the bootstraps and get on with it".
I needed this trip to "get on with it".
To move past all of the confusion, to stop hiding from my feelings. To open my heart even further, become at peace with myself, to be whole.
To be wild.
A friend referred to me during our retreat at Nomadic.
The truth is, I am wandering, and I always will.
I will be forever grateful to have wandered to Costa Rica entirely on my own, knowing only 1 person whom I had never met in person before.
What a bittersweet feeling
I guess the moral of the story is to Follow your heart! It will never lead you in the wrong direction.
Answer your calling, whatever that is.
And be true to yourself.
I owe a HUGE part of this experience to being an Ambassador for Run Like a Girl. In such a short time SO many doors have opened for me, many changing my life for the better.
I could never ask for for more.
So Thank You!
I could never ask for for more.
So Thank You!